The rescuing hug

The article details the first week of life of a set of twins, Kyrie and Brielle. Apparently, each were in their respective incubators, and one was not expected to live. A hospital nurse fought against the hospital rules and placed the babies in one incubator. When they were placed together, the healthier of the two threw an arm over her sister in an endearing embrace. The smaller baby's heart rate stabilized and her temperature rose to normal. They both survived, and are thriving, in fact, the two girls went home to share a crib, and still snuggle. The twins are happy kindergartners now. The hospital changed their policy after they saw the effect of putting the two girls together, and now they bed multiples together. Let us not forget to embrace those whom we love and never underestimate the power of a hug! Hug someone today!

Смотреть далее | 06.01.2025 | Отправить ссылку друзьям

Three drunks

Two drunks are walking along. One drunk says to the other, “What a beautiful night… look at the moon.” The other drunk stops and looks at his drunk friend. “That’s not the moon,” he says, “that’s the sun.” They started arguing for a while when they came upon another drunk, so they stopped him. “Sir, could you please help settle our argument? Tell us what that thing is up in the sky that’s shining. Is it the moon or the sun?” The third drunk looked at the sky and then looked at them and said, “Sorry, I don’t live around here.” Three drunks

Смотреть далее | 05.01.2025 | Отправить ссылку друзьям

Strong Man

The strong young man at the construction site was bragging that he could outdo anyone in a feat of strength. He made a special case of making fun of one of the older workmen. After several minutes, the older worker had had enough. "Why don't you put your money where your mouth is," he said. "I will bet a week's wages that I can haul something in a wheelbarrow over to that outbuilding that you won't be able to wheel back." "You're on, old man," the braggart replied. "Let's see what you got." The old man reached out and grabbed the wheelbarrow by the handles. Then, nodding to the young man, he said, "All right. Get in."

Смотреть далее | 04.01.2025 | Отправить ссылку друзьям

O’Malley’s last stand

An Irishman named O’Malley went to his doctor after a long illness. After a lengthy examination, the doctor sighed and looked O’Malley in the eye and said, “I’ve some bad news for you. You have cancer, and it can’t be cured. I’d give you two weeks to a month to live.” O’Malley was shocked and saddened by the news, but he managed to compose himself and walk from the doctor’s office into the waiting room. There, he saw his son who had been waiting. O’Malley said, “Well son, we Irish celebrate when things are good, and we celebrate when things don’t go so well. In this case, things aren’t so well. I have cancer, and I’ve been given a short time to live. Let’s head for the pub and have a few pints.” After three or four pints, the two were feeling a little less somber. There were some laughs and more beers. They were eventually approached by some of O’Malley’s old friends who asked what the two were celebrating. O’Malley told them that the Irish celebrate the good and the bad. He went on to tell them that they were drinking to his impending end. He told his friends, “I’ve only got a few weeks to live as I have been diagnosed with AIDS.” The friends gave O’Malley their condolences, and they had a couple more beers. After his friends left, O’Malley’s son leaned over and whispered his confusion. “Dad, I though you said that you were dying from cancer? You just told your friends that you were dying from AIDS!” O’Malley said, “I am dying of cancer, son. I just don’t want any of them sleeping with your mother after I’m gone.” O’Malley’s last stand

Смотреть далее | 04.01.2025 | Отправить ссылку друзьям

Sign of the times

Two deaf people got married. During the first week of marriage, they found they were unable to communicate in the bedroom when they turned the lights off because they couldn’t see each other using sign language. After several nights of fumbling around, the wife decided to find a solution. “Honey,” she signed, “Why don’t we agree on some simple signals? For instance, at night, if you want to have sex with me, reach over and squeeze my right breast once. If you don’t want to have sex, reach over and squeeze my left breast once.” The husband thought this was a wonderful idea and signed back to his wife, “Great idea, now if you want to have sex with me, reach over and pull my penis one time, and if you don’t want to have sex, reach over and pull my penis… 50 times.”

Смотреть далее | 03.01.2025 | Отправить ссылку друзьям

The blonde joke 2

One day a brunette, a redhead and a blonde decide to go through their daughter’s purses. The brunette goes through her daughter’s purse and finds cigarettes. She says: “Oh my god, I’m so ashamed! My daughter smokes.” The redhead goes through her daughter’s purse and finds an empty can of beer. She says: “Oh my god I’m so ashamed! My daughter drinks.” Finally, it’s the blonde’s turn and she finds a used condom. She says: “Oh my god I’m so ashamed! My daughter has a penis!”

Смотреть далее | 02.01.2025 | Отправить ссылку друзьям

The blonde joke

Two blond men were walking through the woods on a hunting trip when one looked down and said, “Oh, look at the deer tracks.” The other blond man looked down and said, “Those aren’t deer tracks, those are wolf tracks.” “No. Those are deer tracks,” replied the first blond guy. They kept arguing, and arguing, until a half hour later when they were both killed by a train.

Смотреть далее | 01.01.2025 | Отправить ссылку друзьям

Three parrots

A man goes into a pet shop to buy a parrot. The shop owner points to three identical looking parrots on a perch and says, “The parrot to the left costs $500.” “Why does the parrot cost so much?” the customer asks. The owner says, “Well, it knows how to use a computer.” The customer asks about the next parrot and is told, “That one costs $1,000 because it can do everything the other parrot can do plus it knows how to use the UNIX operating system.” Naturally, the increasingly startled man asks about the third parrot and is told, “That one costs $2,000.” Needless to say this begs the question, “What can IT do?” The owner replies “To be honest I’ve never seen it do a thing but the other two call him boss!” Three parrots

Смотреть далее | 31.12.2024 | Отправить ссылку друзьям

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