Waiting For Love

Waiting For Love This guy in a bar notices a woman, always alone, who comes in on a fairly regular basis. After the second week, he made his move. "No thank you," she said politely." "This may sound rather odd in this day and age, but I'm keeping myself pure until I meet the man I love." "That must be rather difficult," the man replied. "Oh, I don't mind too much," she said. "But, it has my husband pretty upset."

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Загадки для детей на английском с отгадками

Think fast: There's an electric train traveling south. The wind is from the north-west. In which direction would the smoke from the train be blowing? An electric train has no smoke! - Электричка не имеет дыма! How much water can you put into an ipty 2 quart jar? None, it would not be ipty - Ничего, он уже не будет пустым. What is black and white and pink all over? An ibarrassed zebra - смущенная зебра. What clothes does a house wear? Address - адрес Where can you find roads without cars, forests without trees and cities without houses? On a map - на карте Where were lions first found? In a tree - на дереве Why do birds fly south in winter? It's too far to walk - это очень далеко, чтобы дойти Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side - Чтобы добраться до другой стороны Why did the bird cross the road? It was the chicken's day off. What is a bird after it is 5 yeas old? Six years old - шесть лет What is always in bed but never sleeps? A river - река What gets bigger the more you take away from it? A hole - дырка What black and white all over? A newspaper - газета What kind of apple isn't an apple? A pineapple - ананас What teaches without talking? A book - книга

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What People Say About Their Hobbies - Что люди говорят о своих увлечениях

What People Say About Their Hobbies - Что люди говорят о своих увлечениях Emily, 41, bank manager I can say that my hobby is dog training. I have a dog Jerry and we are best friends. Jerry follows all my commands and performs some simple tricks. We understand each other perfectly. I spend 2-3 hours a day training Jerry and it takes me a lot of effort but it's so much fun! Dogs are very devoted and understanding creatures and it is a great pleasure and entertainment to communicate with them. When Jerry is disobedient I never punish him but ignore his bad behaviour. And I often give him sweets and cookies as a reward. Nicholas, 53, cook My favourite pastime is amateur astronomy. When a school boy I liked physics and astronomy and dreamt of becoming astronaut. Observing and studying celestial objects is very interesting and romantic. Viewing the night sky you can see stars, the Moon, planets, comets and meteor showers. Of course you won't see much looking at the sky with the naked eye, that's why I use optical telescopes. I often keep records of my observations and share useful information with other amateur astronomers. Now my dream is to discover a new comet and to make some useful contribution to astronomy. William, 67, pensioner I started collecting milk-jugs 12 years ago. At first my collection was small but today I have more than 200 items in it. I like drinking tea with milk and I have all sorts of milk-jugs in my collection. Most of them are attractively displayed on the shelves in my living-room. My relatives and friends know about my passion and they often add to my collection. My granddaughter often travels abroad on business and for pleasure and she always presents milk-jugs to me. I also collect antique clocks and icons, but my collection is still very small. Alexander, 21, messenger Parkour teaches you to move quickly and efficiently and to overcome obstacles such as concrete walls, high fences or rocks. It has no set of rules or competitiveness. Parkour helps me develop my body and mind and gives me much energy. I learn to trust myself and to be b. Parkour teaches me to overcome everyday difficulties and to approach problems differently. My friends and I practice in parks and abandoned structures. We try to avoid injuries but of course everything happens. You need no particular equipment: just a T-shirt, light trousers and comfortable athletic shoes. I think parkour has changed my life and my attitude to everything. What People Say About Their Hobbies

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Drunk Driver

English joke: Drunk Driver A female officer arrests a drunk. She warns him, "You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be held against you." The drunk replies, "Boobs."

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Generation Gap: Reality or a Psychological Prejudice - Конфликт поколений: реальность или психологическое предубеждение

Generation Gap: Reality or a Psychological Prejudice - Конфликт поколений: реальность или психологическое предубеждение To my mind generation gap is rather reality than a psychological prejudice. It has always been a topical problem and it still remains urgent nowadays. So what does a generation gap mean? It is a popular term used to describe big differences between people of a younger generation and their elders. This can be defined as occurring 'when older and younger people do not understand each other because of their different experiences, opinions, habits and behavior'. The term first came into prominence in Western countries during the 1960s, and described the cultural differences between the Baby Boomers and their parents. Although some generational differences have existed throughout history, during this era differences between the two generations grew significantly in comparison to previous times, particularly with respect to such matters as musical tastes, fashion, drug use, culture and politics. Nowadays you will hardly find a boy or a girl satisfied with their parents. Neither will you find a grown-up, a parent not grumbling over 'younger generation' of their children. Pop music, ultra-modern clothes, noisy parties and children's wish to have more freedom become a stumbling-block on the way of mutual understanding between adults and their offspring and help foster differences between parents and teenagers. So it seems that in most families parents don't understand their children and children don't understand their parents. According to the older generation teenagers are lazy, carefree, ungrateful, impolite and rude. They wear ridiculous clothes, listen to awful music and all they think about is parties, dates, friends and entertainment. Teenagers have very little responsibility and very few problems. But is it really so? If we look inside the mind of a teenager, we will see a very different picture. Teenagers are greatly worried about a great number of things: their appearance, relations with friends, parents and teachers, the way other people (especially their peers) treat them. They suffer from pimples, bullies, problems at school, misunderstanding with their boyfriend/girlfriend, lack of self-confidence, etc. Teenagers often don't know what they are good at and their future seems to be rather vague. Every day they face a lot of stressful situations and feel depressed. Besides they have constant pressure from betters and elders as to how they should act, behave, look and feel. There are a lot of books and films devoted to the problem of the generation gap. One of such films is 'Freaky Friday' (2003). The wide generation gap between Tess Coleman (Jamie Lee Curtis) and her teenage daughter Anna (Lindsay Lohan) is more than evident. They simply cannot understand each other's preferences. They have absolutely different views on clothes, hair, music, duties and even people. On a Friday morning the mother and the daughter switch bodies. As they adjust with their new personalities, they begin to understand each other more and eventually they gain respect for the other's point of view. It is 'selfless love' that changes them back. But of course there is no magic in real life, that's why there should be some other way to bridge the gap between parents and their children. To my mind communication is the best way to solve the problem. The more time adults and children spend together, the more they talk and discuss different things the better they understand each other. It is very important to be selfless and open-minded, patient and sincere. Despite the great changes in the electronic and technological environment in the last several decades, a defined gap does not separate today's generations as it did in the sixties and seventies. So the 'generation gap' can disappear. If we are a little wiser, children will find a key to the heart of their parents and vice versa. Generation Gap: Reality or a Psychological Prejudice

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Girls' Night Out

Two women where at a pub, having a fun night out, away from their husbands. When they got out and started walking back home, they suddenly had a strong urge to pee. They decided to do it in the cemetery, where they figured no one will notice them. Once they were done, they remembered they didn't bring toilet papers. The first one took her panties off, used it like paper and threw it away. The second used some flowers from one of the tombs. The day after, one of the husbands called the other and said, angrily: "Looks like our wifes had quite a good time yesterday. Mine came home without her panties!". The other one answered, even more angry: "That's nothing. Mine came back with a small note sticked to here ass, saying 'we will never forget you. love, from all the guys"...

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What Can See Foreign Tourists in Moscow - Что иностранные туристы могут увидеть в Москве

What Can See Foreign Tourists in Moscow Moscow is one of the most fascinating cities in Europe to visit. World famous sights are all on offer, from the Kremlin and Red Square to fine art museums and historic treasures of the state and churches, as well as incomparable religious icons. One of the things stranger is to do is to pay a visit to the Lenin Mausoleum to peer at the embalmed body of the former Soviet leader. This is extremely popular with locals, who come to pay their respects, so expect to queue with hundreds of them for at least 20-30 minutes before being ushered into the Mausoleum single file. Guards are positioned at various points to guide people through the dark tomb. A quick walk around and you are out again. It almost seems inappropriate to stop and stare at the body for any length of time. The whole experience is rather bizarre, not only because you are looking at a dead Lenin, but also from the atmosphere created by the strict entry formalities and rather stern looking guards. The Kremlin is what Moscow is most famous for. Once the home of the Tsars and the old headquarters of the Soviet Union, it is now the residence of the Russian President. The Kremlin has been the architectural focus of the city since the first wooden Kremlin was built in 1156. Now it houses several cathedrals and churches, the Faceted Palace, Ivan the Great Bell Tower, plus the magnificent State Armoury with its stunning collections of costumes, golden chariots and paintings, as well as the State Diamond Fund. A reminder of the Soviet era exists too with the grey modern concrete building, the Palace of Congresses that was built next to the historical palaces and onion domed churches. The other well-known landmark is the Red Square with the famous onion domes of St Basil's Cathedral at the southern end. The square is around 500 metres in length and was originally a market square for the Kremlin in the late 15th century. It has long been a place of protests and processions, but is now used more often for cultural events, firework displays and concerts. The cathedral was commissioned by Ivan the Terrible and completed in 1561. Combine these world-class cultural sights with a thriving entertainment scene including ballet, opera, theatre and a wide choice of lively nightlife venues, and Moscow is a great choice. Что иностранные туристы могут увидеть в Москве Москва — один из самых очаровав тельных городов в Европе, который можно посетить. Здесь можно увидеть всемирно известные достопримечательности, от Кремля и Красной площади до прекрасных художественных музеев, исторических сокровищниц государства и церквей с их бесценными иконами и фресками. Первое, что должен сделать незнакомец, это посетить Мавзолей Ленина, посмотреть на забальзамированное тело прежнего советского вождя. Это очень нравится местному населению, которое приезжает отдать дань уважения, поэтому, прежде чем пройти в единственную комнату Мавзолея, ожидая, сотни людей стоят в очереди в течение по крайней мере 20-30 минут. Везде стоит охрана, чтобы провести людей в темную могилу. Короткая экскурсия — и вы снова снаружи. Кажется почти невероятным, что можно остановиться и смотреть на тело в течение какого-то отрезка времени. В целом такой опыт довольно причудлив, не только потому, что вы смотрите на мертвого Ленина, но также из-за атмосферы, созданной строгими формальностями входа и довольно строгими на вид охранниками. Кремль — гордость Москвы. Когда-то царский дом и старый штаб Советского Союза, теперь это место жительства российского президента. Кремль был архитектурным центром города, тогда как первый деревянный Кремль был построен в 1156 г. Теперь он включает несколько соборов и церквей, Граненую Палату Ивана Грозного, колокольню, плюс великолепную государственную Оружейную Палату с ее ошеломляющими коллекциями костюмов, золотых колесниц и картин, и государственный Алмазный Фонд. Напоминание о советской эре связано с серым современным зданием, Дворцом Съездов, который разместился рядом с историческими дворцами и маковками церковных куполов. Другой известный ориентир — Красная площадь с маковками куполов Собора Василия Блаженного в южном конце. Площадь, имеющая около 500 метров в длину, первоначально, в конце 15-го столетия, являлась рыночной площадью Кремля. Она долго была местом бунтов и гуляний, но теперь чаще используется для культурных мероприятий, фейерверков и концертов. Собор был заложен Иваном Грозным и закончен в 1561 г. Прибавьте к этим культурным достопримечательностям мирового масштаба процветающую сцену, включающую балет, оперу, театр, разнообразие мест ночных развлечений — и Москва станет хорошим выбором. What Can See Foreign Tourists in Moscow

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Bee Jokes for the Pollen in You

Bee Jokes for the Pollen in You What is the clumsiest insect? The Bumbling Bee. What did the Bee say when he returned to the hive? "Honey, I'm Home!" What is a bee's favorite band? The Bee Gees. What was their #1 song? "Stay in the Hive." Bee Jokes for the Pollen in You

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